When You Mess Up...

And we all do, own it.

Messed up your life, your relationship, your job, a friendship, a task? Failed to follow through on a commitment, a vow, a goal?

You can choose to ignore the error and continue down the same path. You can feel overwhelmed with guilt and spiral down into depression. I say, "Own it".

Own your mistakes. Your faults. Your sins. You are responsible for your shortcomings (and also what you do about them).

A few recommendations:

1. Take full responsibility for what you did and where you are today. You are where you are today mainly due to the cumulative decisions you've made up until this point. This is the first step in being able to change.

2. Realize your future decisions lie with you. No one is coming to the rescue. God never abandons us, but even He says "Choose you this day whom ye will serve..". He offers salvation, yet we still have to willingly believe in what He offers us. For things to turn out differently often requires different decisions to be made. If you don't like where you've been or where you are going, when will you choose to change the path you walk?

3. Apologize where needed. Repent if necessary. Forgive others. Forgive yourself. Clear the air and clean the slate. Move forward unencumbered with the emotional and spiritual weights that limit you from your best life.

4. Be realistic. No one is perfect. My dad always says, "The last perfect person was crucified.". I recommend you stop being a hardcore perfectionist or the guy with the "could care less" attitude. Neither is beneficial. Strive to do your best but also realize you are going to fail. So when you fail, own your failures. Own your mistakes. Repair the damage where you can. Apologize. Ask forgiveness. Forgive yourself. Make better decisions going forward.

5. Figure out what you want going forward. This time you may want to actually aim or aim at something different. If you don't know where you are going I promise you that's exactly where you'll end up. If the choices seem overwhelming, start with one. Pick one small thing and follow through. Start building some successes. Gain some positive forward momentum. And have an action and attitude plan for when you mess up on your new direction.

Life is a long road. Not the paved kind. Many times the path is unclear. Many times there are forks in the road. Many times you have to hack your way through. But when you are able to hit the main road and the way is clear - when you are doing what you know is best and you own your direction, that's when the scenery is a delight to behold along the way.